I am writing you tonight from beautiful San Francisco!
As I am relaxing in the California mountains with family, I had some time to do a bit of reflection and was inspired to write this post.
Life has afforded me such wonderful growth experiences. I have worked at some great corporations, had very interesting careers, and met many friends along my journey. There have been ups and downs, sadness and happiness, eye-opening experiences, and friends and relationships that have come and gone.
But at the end of the day, my constant has always been my family.
My family has always supported my decisions and allowed me to be the unique ME that I am, without judgment.
Indirectly, they have taught me what unconditional love is. I am so thankful that my parents have instilled in me a sense of what it is to be a good friend, a good parent, a good spouse, and a hard worker. Although at times old resentments, old situations, and a clash of personalities may arise, being a coach has helped me deal with family and relationships stressors so much better than I have in the past. And because of this, my immediate family and I are closer than ever.
Every action, decision, and choice I make in life, I always think of my family and what they would do and how they would view me.
No relationship is perfect, no friendship is perfect, no family is perfect, and no one person is perfect.
As we near the end of another year, I had the time to re-evaluate the relationships and friendships in my life to start 2014 new and fresh. I recently have had to let go of a few friendships that I have been holding on to because of the length of the friendships and my sentimentality of our past experiences together. But quality of friendship is more important to me than quantity of years. For the first time I have had the strength and courage to let go of the friendships that no longer serve a purpose nor add positive value to my life. Sometimes we outgrow old friends and there is nothing wrong with it. There is a saying that you are the average of the 5 closest people you surround yourself with. I choose to surround myself with positive, supportive, successful friends who push me to be my best with a genuine, caring, loving, generous sincerity.
We grow and change every day. Your true friends and soulmate will accept you and actually encourage you to grow into your best self, without judgment and without jealousy. They will push you to become your very best that you can be. I see my parents, who have been married for 41 years and see through old photos, how they have evolved individually and together. We will all go through our own crises – quarter-life crisis, mid-life crisis, job crisis, family crisis. We will all get old, wrinkly, and our bodies will change and function less efficiently than they did when we were invincible teenagers. Our exteriors are just a shell to hold what is most valuable – our souls. Surround yourself with those who see your soul as it is without trying to change you or judge you.
As we head towards a new year, I encourage you to embrace change, continue to grow, leave the negative people behind, keep your true friends close, and work hard to put forth your best self in 2014.
“True nobility is being superior to your former self.” – Ernest Hemingway